Never Let Go
by True-Smile
Summary: Will the Mauraders be able to show a young woman what it means to have a family, a home. Will Remus's feelings overpower his 'problem' and let him have a happy relationship he's always wanted and deserved, even if it is with a girl who might feel unworthy


I unfortunately do not own any of the creative thoughts of J

I unfortunately do not own any of the creative thoughts of J.K. Rowling, but I do enjoy her work and felt it would be interesting to put my own twist to her amazing literary devices of Harry Potter. I also do not own the poem (The first few lines of each chapter) 'It's All Relative' by Patrick Tolan.

Anyways hope you enjoy!

* * *

"Family should mean that arguments can be forgotten

Family should be there when you're feeling downtrodden"

* * *

"Goodbye honey, have fun this year! And please try to keep out of trouble." Yup, it was that time of year; parents allowing letting go of their insecurities and let their children start in the path of individuality.

The kids always have a love hate relationship with this departure. Love being the freedom, hate being the separation. All of these put together always ends in the same way: tears, laughs, hugs and the ever most popular roll of the eyes (usually coming from the kid).

Slowly carrying my luggage along Platform 9 ¾, I tried to witness the least amount of family affection as was possible. Trying desperately to get in the train as quickly as I could, I was too focused to realize the trunk just in front of me until it was too late.

"Bloody hell," I groaned as I found myself laying face down on the pavement. I could feel a sharp pain on my right knee and forehead… lovely way to start this school year off. Slowly turning to my side so my back was on the pavement I heard an apology being repeated over and over again.

"Are you alright?" A husky voice asked from above me. Slowly opening my eyes, which was much more difficult than usual thanks to the massive goose egg that will be formed on my forehead soon, I saw the unmistakably soft green eyes of Remus Lupin.

Groaning again as I shut my eyes trying to lessen the pain, I brought my left hand to that part of the forehead.

"Here, let's get you sitting up." Feeling warmth on my left arm and my back that was created from that of masculine hands which helped get me into a sitting position. Taking my hand off my forehead and opening my eyes once again, I noticed it wasn't as bad as the first time.

"Thanks," I said in a small voice. Taking my time I slowly stood up and picked up my own trunk. Remus stood along with me, and even though he stood at a 6'3 in height he was still unbelievably graceful.

"Look, I'm really sorry. It was a bad time to decide to tie my shoe apparently." He said with a small laugh.

"My fault… no worries."

With not making eye contact through the entire situation other than the short time at the beginning I slowly brought my gaze up and was entranced with the amazing green eyes. Just as he was about the say something a voice broke me out of my trance and a very noticeable blush formed on my cheeks.

"MOONY," Sirius's voice boomed above the crowd as he rushed over toward Remus and me. "You have to help me peel James off of Lily long enough to do the… "He took a quick glance at me then stated, "You know."

Remus looked at me with a guilty face and said, "Are you alright? I could go look for a Professor to heal your forehead (apparently he hasn't seen my knee yet). Or even just…"

A massive groan could be heard from Sirius who was fidgeting like a ferret.

"No thanks…. I'll be fine." I replied in my usual unconfident, boring voice. With that I slowly made my toward the train while making sure I was watching where I was walking and luckily found an empty compartment. After hoisting my trunk onto the railing above I was able to sit and try to ignore the pains coming from my knee and forehead.

Looking out the window I saw a mother, obviously knew to the entire separation with her child, hug her little boy with all her might and gently kissed him on his forehead. I always wondered what it would be like to receive that kind of tenderness… love.

From what I've been told my mother was in her early twenties when she brought me to the orphanage. I was 18 weeks old, and when they refused to take me in she waited for them to have their backs turned and took off… without me. Ever since then I've been transferred between foster homes and the orphanage.

Most couples who took me home would keep me for two months at the most before handing me back. Never leaving an explanation just apparently didn't make the right decision in picking the child. So far Jen and Steve, my current 'parents' have kept me for almost two years now. I think it helps I'm only at their house for the two months of summer vacation and Christmas holidays but they seem to be willing to help with financial needs of mine.

I've never had a family. I've never had a home. I've always kept to myself, I can trust myself and it meant I'd never be disappointed. Most people think I'm shy, yeah that's one word for it I on the other hand say I'm just scared. Scared of failure, scared of trusting someone and getting disappointed…its happened more than enough in my life already.

Knock Knock

Snapping out of my thoughts, I realized that the train had already started and we were probably about an hour's way into the trip already. Looking to the door there stood the witness to my earlier clumsy act.

With a generous smile he said, "I noticed you were by yourself. Like some company?"

"Oh, um… no thanks." Please just go back with your friends. Please don't be the nice guy you always are and try and not do the right thing. PLEASE just leave me alone. Not that having an amazingly gorgeous guy in the same compartment is a bad thing, but when he is one of the most popular guys in school, anyone would get a little uncomfortable.

Trying not to make eye contact I was suddenly very amused at watching my hands fidget.

"I also noticed you haven't fixed your injury yet." Seeing his legs sit across from me I saw him raise his wand and whisper a small incantation. Instantly the pain in my forehead cleared and all that was left was the knee. My jeans had been ripped due to the fall so the bleeding of the scrap was unfortunately noticeable.

"Better?" I quickly looked up and saw an amused smirk on the perfect face of his. With a small smile just when I was about to thank him the giggles coming from outside the door started.

Looking over I noticed at least three fifth years whose robes were already on and showed them to be Ravenclaws. Noticing that Remus's attention was on them they giggled some more, waved and almost fainted when he gave a slight nod. One being brave enough opened the door and asked if he minded if they sat in this compartment with him.

"Unfortunately I am not the founder of this compartment so I do not have the rights of who may sit here. Leigh, if you would give them an answer." He replied with almost a pleading look in his eyes.

Surprised he even knew my name I quietly told the girls they could and slowly made an excuse of departure not two minutes after the three younger girls were settled and quite happily chatting away with the Remus Lupin.

Two minutes into trying to find a private place to change the pain in my knee over took my patience and I whipped out my wand, not even bothering to say an incantation it was gone and I knew the injury was healed. Every since I first heard about a Healer I was instantly fascinated. After taking out every book similar in the library and practically memorizing the information and practised almost every spell and potions (except for those which ingredients were impossible to have in possession), I would hope that one day I would be able to save a life.

Continuing my search for a private place I came upon a compartment door… with no window? That's strange. Gently knocking on the door to make sure I wouldn't walk on anything too private (it unfortunately has happened before) I slowly opened the surprisingly unlocked door.

Trying not to giggle, I crossed my arms and leaned against the door frame with that smile of amusement gracing my face. There hanging from the ceiling by a small hook in the very middle of the compartment was what looked to be a first year boy hanging from the back of his plaid boxers.

"Need some help?" I asked.

Whipping his head toward my voice he said, "No thanks." Wonderful a stubborn kid… this will be interesting.

"Oh come on, you're hanging by your boxers covered in blue slimy goop and you don't want help?"

"Maybe I like the view." He replied in a snide voice.

"And the goop…?"

"It's refreshing." Wow, witty.

"Alright, at least I offered." Just as I was about to close the door I heard the begging I'd been waiting for.

"Wait! Don't just leave me here! PLEASE!"

Walking back into the compartment I shut the door behind me and took a seat while staring up at the boy. He was looking at me with pleading eyes but I wasn't going to free him just yet.

"Who did this to you?"

"Some Gryffindors… don't really know their names. Think they called themselves the Malaurders?" Typical… the Maraurders are known for not only their unbelievable good looks and very many relationships, but for their pranks as well.

"And your name?"

"Can't you just put me down?" Shaking my head he continued," It's Kenneth. Kenneth Mason."

"And are you Kenneth, a First year?"

"Unfortunately." He said with a sigh.

"Here…" Slicking my wand he was slowly levitated back down to the floor and the rip in his boxers was mended. Still dripping in … goop? I decided to try a vanishing spell and surprisingly it worked. I could now see the short dark brown hair and tanned complexion Kenneth's appearance had. Looking into the hazel eyes he mumbled a thank you, it's the thought that counts right.

Frantically grabbing his pants that were flung to the corner of the compartment he tried to prevent losing even more of his pride by getting them on as quickly as he could. Shifting my gaze toward the window I watched the beautiful scenery that was passing by.

"Well… thanks." Kenneth replied with a bit more sincerity than the first time.

Not moving my gaze from the window I replied," Any time."

"You want me to stay here or am I free to go?"

"No, you can go."

"You're just going to stay here by yourself? What have no friends?"

Not even bothering to answer him I kept watching all the trees and rivers pass by. I'm content with sitting by myself; I've done it every year since I've been here.

Suddenly there was a person sitting in front of me.

"You really know how to make a guy feel guilty, you know that?" Kenneth said with an irritated face. "Just warning you, I'm a first year so this might take all train ride to answer some of the things I'm curious about." And for the first time since I met Kenneth, I saw a small but noticeable genuine smile on his face.

"Try me." And with that, in some strange way, Kenneth and I made a connection, not friends, but acquaintances. And for me… that was an improvement.

* * *

Well… there you have it. This story is going to be a novel length when completed. I have to warn you though I may not be able to update often; sometimes it might take a month with my life schedule.

Please let me know if I should continue this! I don't want to be trying to write this story if no one is interested in it.


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